I buy haunted houses
I want to be upfront in saying that I have never bought a haunted house (that I know of). But I can confidently say that “I buy haunted houses” because we buy houses in any condition. The reason I buy houses like this because I’m in the business of solving people’s problems, specifically their problems selling their homes. In addition, I am actively seeking to buy a haunted house in the near future. So if you know of one, please let me know! That said, this page describes the process I’ve developed to successfully buy a haunted house, which I will continue to refine as I buy haunted houses.
Why I buy haunted houses
I buy houses for all sorts of reasons. It gives me great pleasure to buy haunted houses in particular because in most cases I am bringing tranquility and peace to someone’s life. I’ve developed a team with techniques for treating haunted houses, so I’m not just bringing peace to the seller, I’m helping to rejuvenate neighborhoods and communities.
Steps I take when I buy haunted houses
When someone with a haunted house calls me, usually they aren’t asking me “Is my house haunted?” They’re usually already convinced that it really is. The first thing I do is share with them my advice on how to sell a haunted house. If the person wants to sell the house to me, I do what I call ‘due diligence’ on the haunted house. I seek to understand from the seller the conditions around the haunting, such as:
- How long it’s been haunted
- Why it might be haunted (sometimes the seller might have an idea, sometimes it’s just based on local lore or rumors)
- What are the signs that its haunted (most of the time it’s something that’s explainable, such as a flickering light caused by an electrical shortage)
Things I check for
After gathering this information from the seller, I conduct my own tests. I bring in experts and inspectors to test the plumbing, electricity, air ducts, and more. In most cases, the house is only haunted in the mind of the person living there. Some of the most popular reasons we’ve found a house that was mistakenly believed to be haunted:
- Branches rubbing against a window or roof
- Critters living in the attic or running around on the roof
- Electrical shortages causing flickering lights or other weird things
- Plumbing stoppages causing weird noises to come from pipes
- Improper circulation causing drafts
- Dead animals in the attic or walls causing foul odors (yes it happens)
If that fails…
If, after inspection, we determine there is no physical cause for the unnatural signs, we’ll bring in a psychic medium or paranormal expert to test the house for haunting. They’ll first start off with a thorough tour of the house, looking for all evidence of ghosts. This includes things such as negative energy or even physical evidence. After they test the house, they can also conduct a “house cleansing.” This purports to rid the home of ghouls. The actual way these experts cleanse the house varies wildly. Some will play music, dance around the house. Others use things like fire, incense, holy water, sage, or other natural elements in their work. Many will use a spirit guide to help communicate with the ghost.
After I’m convinced that the house truly is haunted, I finally want to know if the haunting is tied to the house, or the current occupant’s belongings. It does no good to the seller to leave a “haunted” house, when the actual thing that was haunted was her grandmother’s antique mirror!
How I buy haunted houses
I usually offer cash for haunted houses. This is to let the homeowner escape his or her nightmare as soon as possible. I’ll even contribute to moving expenses sometimes. There are other financing options possible, however, such as seller financing. The price is largely dependent on the condition of the house. The terms are depend largely on the needs of the seller.
What I do after I buy haunted houses
The first thing I do after I buy haunted houses is a full rehab. We replace all dated wires, plumbing, flooring, and doors. Many haunted houses are out of date, so we will update the kitchen counters, cabinetry, and appliances. We’ll do the same for the bathroom, replacing faucets, sinks, bathtubs, and toilets.
We then look for upgrades that will make the home more inviting. This starts with improving the circulation, updating or replacing the HVAC, and installing ceiling fans. We’ll add extra lighting to each room and when necessary and possible, add windows or remove walls.
We hire a psychic medium to explore the spirit of the house and, if necessary, expel the spirits.
In extreme situations, (such as the home is on an Indian burial grounds), we’ll move the house or even level it while archeologists investigate.
These are the steps I follow when I buy haunted houses. The truth is that every house is unique, and every situation unique. Most haunted houses are completely in someone’s imagination, although there are usually other problems associated with the house. For example, they are usually distressed in some way. My job is to solve people’s real estate problems. This is the main reason I buy haunted houses. At the end of the day, whether the house is haunted or not, I’m eliminating a problem for a very stressed seller.